[x]

-So Said The Suicide Note"Everything suddenly
Starts fading from my eyes.
The daylight is blurry,
All I can think of is night…
But even the moonlight is lying
As headlights flash before the red

That I keep driving on through.

Oh I just don't know when to stop…
Honey, I'm not sure how to put this,
But today I've given up.

I'm done with holding on.
Truly, I am sorry everyone.

-I won't forget a single one of you-

Today the sun shined extra bright
As if to say,
'You'll be okay.'

But maybe I'm just not
Trying hard enough.

THE SUN WILL SHINE ON."

-So said the suicide note.

mad houseyou are a moan that
crawls like a tarantula
down the hall to my room.

papier-mâché girls dance
in the garden, wild women, burning
with their dreams of becoming
skeletons, and through their
parchment skin i can see their
wasted hearts struggling to beat.

a dead boy visits me at night.
i lie rigid in my bed, paralysed
while he stands by my window, white
as the underbelly of a fish,
still dripping with water
from the ocean that stole his life.

and i can still feel their hands
on me,
as cold and rotten as the hands
of a corpse,
the prick in my backside while
they fill me with their venom.
they rape me of my life
a

SanitySometimes, I want to look into your eyes and love you.
Sometimes, I just wanna look into your eyes and hope not to cry.

I have the habit of crying.
I am so delicate...yet strong.
I'll get through it.

I'm strong.
You'r a strong woman and I love you.

I want to love you.
Will you take my hand?
And not hurt me?

Who am I?
Do you know?
Are you mistaken?
As you were before?
Do you love me if you knew?
Am I too strange?
Does nothing kill me?
Would nothing kill you?

Hit.
I bleed.

What happened?
My body is covered in blood.
I think it is my own.

Shhh...

Twisted mind.
Not un-kind.
Still a heart as pure as silver and as valua

HateYou hated me so much that now I hate me too.
You succeeded are you fucking happy? There's nothing left of me to love or save yet your son is still trying, still standing there. We can't see each other but he's the only thing keeping me alive and you don't care.
I want to go to somebody anybody and tell them how much I hurt and cry and cut and how it gets me nowhere. I want this to be better. I want you to stop hating me, judging me and lying.
"I'm not trying to sabotage your relationship"
You won't let him see me other than school, let him out of the house except for work and school and you may as well take his phone away too.
I fee

Step by stepYou told me I'd be free.
Free to choose anything, whatever
I wanted to have, to do, to become.
And so I went my way. And I lived with my choices,
I tried to move on.
But I forgot to leave things behind,
some items, and the past.
Because of that,
my so-called freedom, my new life was
nothing.
I was still taunted by everything,
I still moved mechanically
when holding that one object.
And I tried breaking off these chains,
but I kept getting stuck,
all I once tried to forget floats around me.

And I gave in,
once again fooled by my weak mind.
I go back to step one.

Death is my saviourDeath is my life, Death is my saviour,
Everyone thinks I'm weird due to my behaviour,
I always hide away from the world, never really caring,
When its non-uni at school I find everyone's staring,
That girl is weird, ugly, a freak,
I've found the world very grey and bleak.

I'm not able to live a simple life without there being any faults,
Being involved in too many assaults,
I just block out the empty world I live in,
People say that believing in satan is a sin,
I just give them a shrug and a smile saying that's me,
But that's all a lie, fake can't you see?

At home I'm just the same,
This is really serious not a game,
I'm not abl

MonstersDon't let yourself rest.
They wait for your sleep.
They know when you're weak,
When you don't have control,
And they're waiting for you.

Don't close your eyes.
They're already there.
Every time that you blink,
You better hope they don't think
You're alone.

Don't let them know
When you're starting to grow
And beginning to bloom.
They'll find your old tomb
And they'll bury you down.

When you think they're all gone,
When you think they're away,
They'll pounce on your soul
As your trust is betrayed.

Drug MeI am in a medicated haze.
My eyes glaze.
I am not paying attention to what you are saying.
Do not blame me.
I am this way for some sort of reason.
I have labels.
I am a jelly jar.
I play on a par with you.
I miss the manic days.
Oh! How I do!
Jumping on the bed and out of airplanes.
I had my parachute.
Don't you worry.
I am in a hurry to get nothing done.
My brain is full of jam. Or it could be jelly.
And so is my belly.
I should move more often.
But my hands remain by my sides.
I clench them in fists,
Not for fighting.
Just because I am stiff.
From all of the drugs.
Slugs. Tugs. Lugs. Bugs. Billions of worms.

The Super Hero DreamThe Super Hero Dream.

Since I was young I've always had this reoccurring dream.

As immature and juvenile at it may seem.

I'd have this one fantasy…

That me and my peers were apart of a heroic, super natural team.

We would serve and protect the world from impending doom.

But every morning I always end up waking up too soon.

I would stir and gaze around my marvel inspired room.

And attempt to…

Move objects with just will of my mind.

Completely alter my anatomical design.

Teleport in and out of realties and dimensions.

Communicate with anyone via a telepathic connection.

Have an invulnerable metal emerge from my knuckles.

Tale From a Mental WardThere were three things that struck me as odd as, three things that I was not expecting when I walked through those doors.

The first was that the area they had set solely for teenagers was completely taken up.
The second was there actually was a children's ward.

The third was that everything that started since November was finally going to land me in a hospital.

Okay, there was a fourth surprise; the fact that I wasn't going to go in there for a physical condition.

It had finally happened. Everything crashed down and they figured out that the feeling in my throat wasn't derived from something that they could actually see. I was experien

It Hurts to KnowIts hurt to wait
knowing that the pain is still deep inside
It hurts to know
how you're life has turned out to be

It hurts to cry
knowing others will be sad
It hurts to know
the life you have lived

It hurts to be here
to suffer through agony
when every second of your life
you are dying on the inside

It hurts to be here
to suffer through pain
to know that this life
was always a mistake

It hurts to feel this pain
to feel it eating inside you
It hurts to know
that you will never respect me

it hurts to be who i am
to know that my life was a mistake
it hurts to be here
to know that this was a mistake to life...

InsomniaIn the night
I lay awake
Can't sleep
can't dream
but just to think

Think about everything
think about the past
even think about the future'
cause in the night I can't sleep

No sleep for me
nothing can happen
what will get me?
will I no longer be here?

Insomnia sucks
it takes over my mind
cause In the night i cant sleep
until I black out

Don't let me sleep!
something gonna get me
don't let me fall asleep
but my body tells me to sleep

Needing the sleep
but fearing it so much
In the night
I can't sleep

Its controlling my mind
while my body needs me to sleep
but in the night
I won't sleep

Not until I black out
so I w

Story Of My LifeI remember when
It was me and you,
And all the lies
That I saw through.
And of all the stupidest things
That I could do,
The absolute worst
Was loving you.

ListenCan you hear me
Listen
Listen to my cries
Hear me
Feel my pain
See your neglect
Understand what you've put me through
Hear me roar
My anger bouncing off the wall
My sadness ringing in
Your deaf ears
Can't you hear me
Do you just not care
Listen to me
Listen
Don't walk away
I'm not finished
If only you'd hear me
If only I could make you see
Why won't you listen
Why don't you care
Do you not see the tears
I'm shedding
You're the one that's made to care
It's your job
Why can't you just listen

Maybe you can't hear me
Yeah
That's it
I'm just not loud enough

Ghost of YouDown on my knees for you
Begging please stop
Picking the good out of me
Heaving on the floor
I need you
But you're killing me
I look in the mirror
My reflection beckons back
Who is she?
Someone falling through the cracks,
That you have made in her broken heart
Someone begging on her knees for you to shut up
Just a girl who wants to be beautiful
Just running from the edge
Into this world unknown
Finding nobody, but the ghost of you...

Browse More Like This

Download File
HTML, 1.8 KB more ▶

More from ~JoplinSpider

You Are Your Own StrangerThe glass blurs out of focus
Onto the empty street
Of dealers and car thieves
Roaming free
Then a stranger hands me something
Through the open window
I begin to think this isn't me
These aren't my memories

Who do we live for
When we live for nothing?
(We live for nothing)

The rain washed all my cares away
The only feeling now is 'cause I'm all alone
No lover to melt with in the night
No savior to take away my fright
So much for good intentions
Which vanish in the wind
I've got no more friends to look to
Only solace is in the dark alleyways

No one can find you when no one's looking
No one to hold you, to tell you it'll be o

His Suicide

Oh, God. Oh my God…
Look at the blood. Look at his face.
A million times I've tried to stop it,
But now I'm just too late.

"I'm not here to say that
This was life's fault.
I was always a burden,
But mostly to myself.
Don't worry, I was dead
Way before I was born.
But sorry I let you down,
Even though I've sworn,"

Look at the blood. Look at his face.
A million times I've tried to stop it,
But now I'm just too late.
Just if I could have said goodbye…
Just if I could have said it one last time…

"'Don't follow the wrong river,
Or you'll never make it to the sea,'
Is what you've always said
When you were look

No Sense At All!Oh, Diana? Hedone?
Mind or emotion

For the hunt or the pleasure
No sense at all

What will I sacrifice?
Is one soul worth the price?

Ha ha ha... Yeah!
You are the way you're born

Oh Aradia, Aradia...
I am guilty you hear?

I'm you as you your father
No sense at all!

You little darling, baby
Who do you worship?

Ha ha ha, oh the silence
Never a virgin mind set

Everything's lovely when it's dead.

Seriously? I'm no witch
I think like a witch

Heehaw! What a fucking, ugh!
No sense at all

Worth n- n- nothing you are
Don't hurt me

Or... Go ahead! See me smiling
Uh, uh. Void, you can do

Two demons on my shoulder
Ah, sweet viole

Mixed EmotionsAll of my favorite things burst into one emotion.
I can't control these sensations

All my passions and pleasures
Flare like wildfire among my fantasies

The thought is warm, sinful, and cuddly
Like a child who is afraid to leave their toys

But my body can't stand just one touch
I need it everywhere, so this feels real

Ooh, it's like sinking my teeth into a luscious fruit
Just one taste won't satisfy

Ah, how I'd love to die
Senses rupture like sexual desire

Your hands up my thighs are the same as
The icy touch of a blade through my flesh

If I walked through fire, I doubt I'd
Feel anything at all, if I feel like this

A succubus

I Guess We'll Wait And SeeI've never seen so many stars
Aside from so many birds
Who sing to set us asleep
Calmly in their trees

The cold call of the sky
The crickets come to tell us it's night
And in the morning they'll be
There to say goodbye

Just if this could last for a moment longer
Before I lay to rest
I want you know, there could be nothing better
Than this night, here alone with you
When I close my eyes, you know what
My dreams will be
So if I do not wake, I want you to know
I've always loved you

The sunset seems so abundant
I don't want this to end
I've always wished to go peacefully
Just like we are now

But now I'm not so sure
Though we'

It Wasn't An AccidentIt glides down gracefully with a drip
Down her perfect ivory skin
Along her young seductive body
Nude and formerly content

Her arms spread out in loss
Lying alone, empty and hollow
Her last movement was
The small twitch of a finger

She seems as if she has fallen
Off a twenty story building
Completely shattered and broken
Her hair in knots in every direction

And she is, oh so beautiful
Sprawled out on the bed
With dark velvet sheets
Her breasts openly visible through the mess

Black nails and long, long lashes
Her mouth is slightly open
Thick and dry but deliciously pink
Though her skin begins to lose color

And that wonder

View Gallery · View Prints

Featured in Groups:

#written-from-within
Written From the Soul

#Emo-Club
+ Emo Love +

#ThePoetryofDA
DA Poetry Club

#YoungButInspired
We support Young Artists!

#deviantArt-emo-Club
For all the different people.

#Mental-IllnessClub
Keep Hope Alive

#DarkFantasyArtists
Emotional dark fantasy worlds

#TheUnheardVoices
The unheard speak up.

Show all (59)

Details

Submitted: October 23, 2012
File Size: 1.8 KB
Submitted with: Sta.sh

Link

Thumb

Statistics

Comments: 23
Favourites: 29 [who?]
Views: 282 (1 today)
Downloads: 2 (0 today)

[x]

The Past

by ~JoplinSpider, Oct 23, 2012, 10:26:56 PM
Literature / Poetry / Emotional / Songs & Lyrics

I'm looking towards the past.
Help me turn away.
The memories are racing fast.
I wish I didn't remember that day…

I'm searching harder for the past.
To make old habits okay.
Help me turn away.
I'm slowly returning to that day

They've made me forget.

I'm looking towards the past.
Help me turn away.
The memories are racing fast.
I wish I didn't remember that day…

I'm searching harder for the past.
To make old habits okay.
Help me turn away.
I'm slowly returning to that day

When suicide was okay.

And I held on in the back of my mind
Without even realizing
And I can't hold my breath no longer
No matter how hard I try.

I'm looking towards the past.
Help me turn away.
The memories are racing fast.
I wish I didn't remember that day…

I'm searching harder for the past.
To make old habits okay.
Help me turn away.
I'm slowly returning to that day

For all I know, I've taken my last breath
Long ago…

Now I'm crashing into the unknown
Head first!

I'm sinking…
Deeper…
I've gone…
Too far to wake up now…

I'm gone…
Forever…
I won't…
Exist no longer….

What's unknown seems so familiar…

And I held on in the back of my mind
Without even realizing
And I can't hold my breath no longer
No matter how hard I try.

And I held on in the back of my mind
Without even realizing
And I can't hold my breath no longer
No matter how hard I try…